White coats are cool

This seasons hottest accessory is so ‘the white coat!’

This white coat is so hot right now!

With the finest medical models on the planet modeling them this autumn winter, the white coat or ‘WC’ is making a long awaited comeback to the ward’s catwalk. The NEJM fashion correspondent Dr. Tobias Saint James spoke exclusively to TJOM:

“Darling, if you want to look fabulous in clinic, then you simply MUST have a little white coat! MRSA is sooooooooo last year. The look is definitely above the elbow and above the knee. A sort of micro mini, a daring sexy little number that will get you noticed!”

She is soooooooooo hot. The pink stethoscope really brings out her ball breaking feminine side.

Other journals of high impact have also picked  up on the trend. The Lancet’s Anna Wintumour says

“White coats are so hot right now! Atul Gawande simply won’t step out of the hospital without his little WC and every little wannabe doctor who is anyone is desperate to get their MRSA soaked hands on one! Scrubs are so last year!”

And so it seems with patients no longer being able to tell the difference between a physician and a cleaner something had to give. So this fall medics from dermatologists to proctologists are going back in time to visit the white coat look. “They are just soooooo good for putting shit in!” Said Dr. Perez Shilton MD, “Like my iphone, and my pens, and my note book and my handbook of medicine and my tourniquet and my wallet and my stethoscope and my fundoscope and my mascara and my lip balm and my keys and my pager and my tendon hammer and my tuning fork and my Da vinci robot! I just love it!”.

White coats are awesome because you can put stuff in them and shit.

To finish off the look real medical fashionistas are wearing a shirt and tie. “Its just sooooo incredibly easy” Says Wintumour “Just get a shirt, iron it and put on a tie and ‘BINGO!” you look like a real bondafida MD! But for the real finishing touch, I recommend having your name embroidered into your lapel!  It is soooooo intimidating and totally cool!” Just check out the fine looking men of medicine below.

With everyone likely to be back in white this Fall, find ways to individualise your look. TJOM recommends pens, lots of pens as they make you look clever and people will always want to talk to you on the ward. Also, try not washing your WC for the entire duration of your rotation. At the end, swab it and see just how many highly drug resistant bacteria you can culture! OMG it will be like totally so awesome!

But! Remember, you can over do it. Just look what happened to Dr. Mendez when she tried a little too hard. Oh dear, what WAS she thinking?!

This look would be totally innapropriate and you should not try it. Wearing your hair down is slutty and it gets in the way during surgery.

Ouch! This guy is so hot right now. The tie really makes him look like when he colonoscopes you he is going to make it all the way to your caecum!

Having your name embroidered on your WC makes you look cool. SCIENCE FACT!

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